GUT CHECK
SETTLE FOR NOTHING
I hadn’t seen Ron since high school. In fact, the last time I saw him was hanging on the top of his friend’s Camaro with his graduation gown billowing out behind him as the car peeled out of the parking lot. He triumphantly howled, “Whaaaahooooo!” I never saw or heard from him again. Until now.
Back in school, Ron was one of those rare people who could be really cool, yet also be a great academic. Ace a calculus test in the morning; score touchdowns on Friday night. When we voted on “most likely to succeed” candidates, Ron’s name was one of the first to come up.
I was standing there talking to Ron and I couldn’t believe I was seeing the same guy. We bumped into each other while watching a youth soccer game. Ron had a lean, athletic build in high school. Ron does not have that build now. In fact, he kept looking around nervously, no doubt worried about being stalked and harpooned by a lost band of nearsighted Eskimos. His monstrous belly was a stunning display of physiology gone awry. He had become one of those guys that still wore size 33 jeans but allowed his enormous mound of belly fat to spill over the top. When he picked up one of his kids, I turned my head to avoid seeing what was no doubt the Grand Canyon of all butt cracks.
What the hell had happened to Ron? And I’m not just talking about his physique. Ron told me he works in a convenience store. No joke. For fun, he goes into his garage and piddles with his woodworking tools. I asked him what he makes. Nothing, he told me. He just piddles. I was sent into further cardiogenic shock when his wife walked up, uh, scratch that, waddled up and thumped down on the bench with us. I felt like a piece of lean meat between two doughy slices of Texas-sized white bread.
Now, I have to confess that I have a little problem with fat people. (And since I used to be fat, that gives me the right to call them fat and whatever other colorful terms I can think of.) Here’s my main problem. When I see a fat man or woman walking down the street, I see someone who has absolutely no respect for themselves. I see someone whose life has spiraled out of control and who does nothing more than make excuses for their pathetic existence. I automatically picture them at an all-you-can-eat buffet gorging as much food down their throat as possible. Then I shudder uncontrollably. I don’t know why this happens and I really really wish it wouldn’t. It’s like the compulsion to look for accident victims when you drive by a car wreck.
Okay, I admit, I’m being harsh to make a point. To get my mind off this disturbing image I began trying to figure out what happens to people like this, people like Ron. The answer was as obvious and as easy to spot as Ron’s three chins. Somewhere along the way Ron settled for less. And when you settle for less, you get even less than what you settled for.
Think about the people who just sit around talking about how they’ll one day start a diet or begin an exercise program. How pathetic is that? Don’t just think about what it is you want, do something about it. Start taking steps towards it. What you’ll experience is an awakening of sorts, a liberation. The feeling hits you like a potent drug the moment you step back on the path. Get addicted to it.
All of this can be summed up in what I call the mouse mentality. Back in college we studied how the mind can overpower the body. We looked at experiments performed on mice. You take a mouse and throw it into a tank of water. The sides are slick and there’s no way to escape. Take another mouse and toss it into another tank of water, only this time put a little raft in there. What researchers found is astonishing.
The mouse that has a chance to escape and get up on the raft will swim for hours trying to reach it. The mouse without hope, without a goal, will simply give up and drown. He does this long before he should be exhausted. Somewhere in his tiny rodent brain, he knows it is hopeless, so he decides to simply give up. Some people are the same way, only they don’t drown. They settle for less. They simply stop swimming.
At one time in our lives, most of us will find ourselves just treading water. The secret is to recognize this time and break out of it. If we don’t we’ll become like Ron. We’ll lose hope; we’ll become numb. Our lives won’t end, but they may never really begin. To really enjoy life, we have to go after what we want and achieve everything of which we are capable. What one can do, one must do. Pull your head out of your Grand Canyon and do something about it. If you want others to respect you, show them that you respect yourself. Start exercising. Lose some of that weight. Show people that you care about yourself and that you deserve their respect.
Settle for nothing.
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